Food and Company ~

An evening with a bunch of company at the cafeteria isn't that bad at all. It also isn't that bad at all even if an unknown caller had accidentally dialed up your number twice by mistake. Food was good, and it was more than enough - they weren't exactly the biggest eaters tonight. Little bits of laughs tossed here and there, and that too was good. Hmm... for awhile, you didn't have to think too much... that I like.

My stomach's filled at about the right level - I'm not overstuffed, and that gives me the comfort knowing that I won't have any difficulty putting myself to sleep later. I'm already sleepy by the way.

A toast to the good simple life for now... to not have too much nor too little. This is one of the last activities for 2009's academic year. 

Not bad at all. No, it wasn't.... 

I'd Like To Think It's Not Final...

I said to one of them, "I think I'll see you again" when actually what I really wanted to say only after I had said that was, "I know I'll see you again"... that would have been better.

A "goodbye"? Or a "see you"? I guess it really depends on how you feel about saying them at a certain given time. Sometimes you say them both respectively, and if you do, which one comes last? Goodbye? Or see you?

Would be good if it were more than just a perhaps...

A Day To Look Back ~

Could you possibly not shed a tear or get moist at the eyes or feel that tightness in your throat when you see many around you having a teary-eyed moment? Or when it hits you that you may not be seeing many around you ever again, or that you may only see a few of them after many years later? Even if you do, would they still remember you then? Or would you... have any traces of them in your memory? 

Give a hug if you must, a hand-shake resembling a warm embrace, a smile showing you mean it, a pose for a captured moment together, or simple words for the heart to treasure. Some of them will still be seeing each other after today, and even after next month, or the many days after. Some will choose to part a little too soon. Either way, or whichever other way it goes, the definition of life will carry them to directions which for the most part, they have little control over, and, if it does seem that they possess the power to control it, well... life perhaps is just being kind to them. 

Could you possibly have everything in the palm of your hands the way you want it to be? No. And for that, I believe that is why the tears fell... that is why the emotions became overwhelming... that is why this is a day they will definitely look back at. 

Graduation... pride... and emotions to humble the flesh.
  
And just so I know later when I read this post again in forward time, today's quote catch is quite a match for the highlighted moment of the day...  

A single rose can be my garden...

a single friend, my world.

                                                                   Leo Buscaglia ~

To be touched by others or someone in some special way is a gift even if the absence may bring a little ache inside.... and know that if it does, a brush of paint has colored your life.  

A picture or two to be uploaded a little later ~ 

                           .      .      .      .      .      .                                     

 

[Added 4th Nov. '09]

Farewell, October '09 ~

Tuhan, adalah kekuatan ku

Bersama Dia ku tak akan goyah...

They're done with sundown worship and now I can hear scrambled voices here and there. As I listen to these sounds, I realize one thing - I was wrong about so many things, and one of them... I thought I wouldn't miss anything about this school year. Turns out to be, that even before the school year officially ends, I'm already missing it for some reason. 

And so I guess, it's not only them feeling it... I am feeling it too. I'll say, Happy Sabbath another time. Til then... November awaits me.

Online...

Could you possibly survive without the good ol' Internet? I'm guessing, no, unless of course you're the type who chooses to live in perfect harmony with nature alone. Well, in the first place, you wouldn't be reading this if you really could. 

I am right now in the classroom, and being able to receive connection from here is so much fun. This I must say, is my first time. Man, this is so cool. I will forever remember this moment. Like, duh. 

Mmm.. okay.. just let it be.. today just has to be better than yesterday or the yesterdays. Still got my health - God hasn't robbed that away from me just yet. Therefore, I'd like to think I have so much more to live for and I gotta let that sink in good. 

Hope (for the better) is what keeps the human spirit alive. I shared that once, right here, in this classroom. Now, I am sharing it here. 

Listen to You

Need to put on some weight, and I don't mean it literally - I don't need to put on extra kilos because I'm not exactly under the category of being underweight (for the height that I am, I'm pretty sure I'm quite fine).

Just need to have some weight on the soles that I have so I can feel... solidity. Now, to explain this with all explicitness would only beat the bore out of me - if that should make any sense at all.

Gotta learn to understand myself better. Yes, it's one of those days where I'm down with a conflict from within. To realize your weakness is a good thing... when you don't do a damn thing about it - when you well know you could - sours things up. That is the bad thing. 

For now, I'm going to load my tummy with something. By 10pm, I should be done fixing whatever it is that I have in mind to chew on. That is late, I know, but sometimes, you say to yourself, "Heck with it" and go on breaking your own set of rules. 

For The Most Part Of It, Does It Have To Come From Me?

So the friend remembers.. but it's not the same at all.

If it's possible, I want to die a happy person. Is that too much a request to ask for?

Just something that struck my mind, and which had never quite did before. 

My image pick for the day.

Hate it when the image captured by my hands and judged by my eyes, seems to be slanting. Either the structure isn't perfect or... it's just plainly my fault. There.

 After publishing this post earlier, I decided I wasn't satisfied with the first (and meant to be the only one) picture, so this one's newly uploaded. This was the first shot actually. Dang, both looks quite the same. The second didn't seem any better than the first, and I'd like to put that as vice versa. Most definitely, my fault.   


~   ~   ~

Which way you heading to? Are your steps bringing you down or up? Or... are you deciding on being stuck in the middle? 

I'll answer my own question... Whichever, so long the position that I decide to put myself in makes me happy. 

Just Don't ~

A mere four left before striking the new hour... and there... it was granted. 

I decided to continue with the cleaning spree that I started on last Friday. Finally, done with my area, and now my working space is not so much of an eyesore. I know, it took me that long to push myself to do it. I had to do it though whether I felt like doing it or not - the busyness sort of kept my sanity for part of the day. I am happy with the results of my effort. At least, that is the single thing I can be happy about for now. 

 My now, clean-looking shelf (part of it). A little dusty on the surface, but that's not too hard a matter to settle.

My key chain and the bunch of keys on its ring with one of them being the defected key (from the incident of the problematic door lock). 

 

My trash basket which doesn't mind being in such lowly places (e.g. under the table). It'll stay empty and clean for the night.

~   ~   ~ 

Need to sit back and relax. But it can't go on forever, because life still has to go on.

Morning! ~

It's moments like those that makes me so alive.. yesterday and also.. times that twice.

Yes, morning from here! Mmm.. yesterday evening until early this morning was good.. still seems very fresh in the air as if it could happen all over again right about now. Wow.. it would be good if it really could. If only our wishes could really come true for the reasons that we think they should. Hmm.. life would be a bliss like a ballerina that graces her way through with nothing to stop her short from those movements. She has absolute control of where she wishes to go and how she wants to do it - she's the prima ballerina assoluta. Life could, perhaps, be a bliss.. life could also, perhaps, assume the pronoun she and not a he.

To go.. or to not go? 
It's tough to beat uncertainty.

Image

Cross Those Fingers ~

It's bad enough that you're caught doing what you were doing.. "Oh, shoot!".. better versions of it to follow.

Me, at my work desk, and obviously taking snapshots of myself.

 







Wonder what the rest of the hours of today holds.